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Aging parents & finances #3226551
09/23/20 10:52 PM
09/23/20 10:52 PM
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 25,517
Tampa
B
Beer Belly Offline OP
Freak of Nature
Beer Belly  Offline OP
Freak of Nature
B
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 25,517
Tampa
(Florida)

My parents, like many on here are increasing in age. Rich has never been something that we have been mistaken for, but my parents lived well within their means and have managed to save some $, have some property, and don't want it to be pissed away.

My mom called me today and asked me to look into what they should do. My mom knows that a nursing home will take every dime that they have ever saved in matter of a few months.

If you have sound advice, great, but I was more looking into who would be best to talk with regarding their situation.


--------------
For what it is worth: I still agree with me!
A big man will stand up for himself; a great man will stand up for others.
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Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226554
09/23/20 11:03 PM
09/23/20 11:03 PM
Joined: Oct 2015
Posts: 6,492
Pelham Al
T
Tigger85 Offline
12 point
Tigger85  Offline
12 point
T
Joined: Oct 2015
Posts: 6,492
Pelham Al
Sent you a pm

Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226555
09/23/20 11:03 PM
09/23/20 11:03 PM
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 5,286
Georgia and Missouri
Semo Offline
12 point
Semo  Offline
12 point
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 5,286
Georgia and Missouri
Find a good CPA and a financial advisor. I have some ideas but every situation is different. As far as financial advisors go I would find one that specializes in estate planning and is particularly versed in the use of life products...but watch out for someone just focusing on his own compensation (there are a bunch of those out there).

Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226557
09/23/20 11:09 PM
09/23/20 11:09 PM
Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 52,352
Gee's Bend/At The Hog Pen
James Offline
Freak of Nature
James  Offline
Freak of Nature
Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 52,352
Gee's Bend/At The Hog Pen
It's good y'all are looking into it Belly. My parents finally took care of their affairs last month, and It was really weird (only way i can describe it i guess) reading over their stuff as if they were already gone



Do not regret growing older, it's a privilege denied to many!

Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: James] #3226567
09/23/20 11:58 PM
09/23/20 11:58 PM
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 30,910
Clanton, AL
Out back Offline
Grumpy Old Man
Out back  Offline
Grumpy Old Man
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 30,910
Clanton, AL
Originally Posted by James
It's good y'all are looking into it Belly. My parents finally took care of their affairs last month, and It was really weird (only way i can describe it i guess) reading over their stuff as if they were already gone

Yes it's awkward, but necessary. The property has to be out of their name for 5 years or it can still be seized for medical expenses.


My opinions and comments are my own. They do not reflect the position or political opinions of Aldeer or any of the Aldeer administration.
Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226589
09/24/20 06:08 AM
09/24/20 06:08 AM
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 19,064
colbert county
cartervj Online content
Old Mossy Horns
cartervj  Online Content
Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 19,064
colbert county
I have a friend going thru this right now with lawyers. His grandfather has a lot of assets and the nursing home is foaming at the mouth trying to get it all.

We went to a lawyer with dad after mom died. It’s weird as heck but necessary.


“Socialism only works in two places: Heaven where they don't need it and hell where they already have it.” ― Ronald Reagan
Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Out back] #3226594
09/24/20 06:31 AM
09/24/20 06:31 AM
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 7,311
Lee County
R
RCHRR Online content
14 point
RCHRR  Online Content
14 point
R
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 7,311
Lee County
Originally Posted by Out back
Originally Posted by James
It's good y'all are looking into it Belly. My parents finally took care of their affairs last month, and It was really weird (only way i can describe it i guess) reading over their stuff as if they were already gone

Yes it's awkward, but necessary. The property has to be out of their name for 5 years or it can still be seized for medical expenses.

Thought they changed it to 7 yrs.

Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226595
09/24/20 06:39 AM
09/24/20 06:39 AM
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 13,718
Over yonder
E
extreme heights hunter Offline
Booner
extreme heights hunter  Offline
Booner
E
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 13,718
Over yonder
What part of florida? If near Pensacola, I can recommend someone that does this every day for the elderly.

Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226598
09/24/20 06:46 AM
09/24/20 06:46 AM
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 10,464
northport
deadeye48 Offline
Booner
deadeye48  Offline
Booner
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 10,464
northport
My wife and I have been taking care of her parents for several years now
Whatever you do make sure everything is out of their name except for a controlling 1%
This is so nothing can be taken by the state as payment for the care they’ll receive if it’s from a NH
A good financial planner and attorney can help with these things


When I need expert advice I tend to talk to myself
The older I get the better I used to be
Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226607
09/24/20 07:18 AM
09/24/20 07:18 AM
Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 14,114
Chilton County
M
MarksOutdoors Offline
Booner
MarksOutdoors  Offline
Booner
M
Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 14,114
Chilton County
Get it done soon while they still have a clear presence of mind. My grandparents are living in a high-end assisted living facility in NW Florida that is over $4,000 per month. They are well taken care of
and that does cost money.


"The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him."
-G. K. Chesterton
Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: extreme heights hunter] #3226610
09/24/20 07:23 AM
09/24/20 07:23 AM
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 25,517
Tampa
B
Beer Belly Offline OP
Freak of Nature
Beer Belly  Offline OP
Freak of Nature
B
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 25,517
Tampa
Originally Posted by extreme heights hunter
What part of florida? If near Pensacola, I can recommend someone that does this every day for the elderly.


South of Tampa


--------------
For what it is worth: I still agree with me!
A big man will stand up for himself; a great man will stand up for others.
Processor Map: https://www.google.com/maps/d/u/0/edit?mid=1OTDcvGoo3puyO-CV10he3pH97IE
Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226625
09/24/20 07:50 AM
09/24/20 07:50 AM
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 312
Alabama, Jackson County
M
MarkAlan Offline
4 point
MarkAlan  Offline
4 point
M
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 312
Alabama, Jackson County
My wife and I moved back to Alabama to take care of my parents back in 2011. My mom passed away last October, and my dad just turned 90. The best advice that I can give you is consult a lawyer, and a financial planner. The strangest thing in the whole process was being added to their accounts, and making decisions for them. I never wanted to know what they had much less handle things for them.

Best of luck to you and your family.

Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226630
09/24/20 07:58 AM
09/24/20 07:58 AM
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 1,929
Opelika
olemossy Offline
8 point
olemossy  Offline
8 point
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 1,929
Opelika
Going through the same thing with my mother right now! Luckily she went through this with my grandmother so that helps some

Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226643
09/24/20 08:10 AM
09/24/20 08:10 AM
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 19,111
Chelsea, AL
straycat Offline
Old Mossy Horns
straycat  Offline
Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 19,111
Chelsea, AL
A quality CPA is worth their weight in gold. In my opinion they typically give best advice without selling you a product or investment.
They will have contacts and can consult with the best options for estate planning, attorneys and financial planners, to fit your specific situation.


"The grass withers, the flower fades, But the word of our God stands forever." Isaiah 40:8

"Neither the wisest constitution nor the wisest laws will secure the liberty and happiness of a people whose manners are universally corrupt.� Samuel Adams
Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226662
09/24/20 08:29 AM
09/24/20 08:29 AM
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 15,757
Montgomery
bamaeyedoc Online content
Old Mossy Horns
bamaeyedoc  Online Content
Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 15,757
Montgomery
Went through this a few years ago with my dad. He definitely had almost everything in order. POA, a will, a living will (which was a blessing), etc. One thing he did many years ago was put his children as owners of any real property. So his lake place was actually in our names when he passed away. He was worried that if he ended up in a nursing home for years that the place would end up being sold and proceeds going to Medicaid/Medicare once all of his $ was gone. That is what is happening to our neighbors right now. The wife is in a nursing home and the husband died about 6 weeks ago. The daughters tried for years to convince their parents to plan and put the home in the children’s names. According to one of the daughters who is a banker, the mother just wouldn’t even consider it. Their parents went through all their savings with medical bills and nursing home bills. When the husband died, Medicaid had a lien on the home (which has been paid off many years ago) to recoup medical expenses. As soon as it sells, all the $ goes to the government and the family will not see a penny.

One thing my dad forgot was not putting one of us as beneficiary of his retirement accounts and as a POD or joint owner on his bank account. He had an auto draft for his offering every week to his church and we had no way to stop it after he died. Took about 2 months to resolve that (Wells Fargo sucks by the way). On the retirement fund, it took over 2 years for them to release the funds to the estate. So much to think about after someone passes away so it’s a must to plan ahead.

Dr. B

Last edited by bamaeyedoc; 09/24/20 08:37 AM.

AKA: “Dr. B”
Aldeer #121
8-3-2000
Proud alum of AUM, UAB, and UA
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Glennis Jerome "Jerry" Harris
1938-2017
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LTJG, USNR



Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226668
09/24/20 08:35 AM
09/24/20 08:35 AM
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 14,938
Right Behind You
W
William Offline
Booner
William  Offline
Booner
W
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 14,938
Right Behind You
Bought my mom a little house not far from us. She still gets around fine, but there is always something going on with her. Anyway, she gets by on her SS and doesn't want for much. We are looking at downsizing and actually moving a little closer to her.


"The misery of being exploited by capitalists is nothing... compared to the misery of not being exploited at all."

Joan Robinson
Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3226671
09/24/20 08:37 AM
09/24/20 08:37 AM
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 25,884
Fayetteville TN Via Selma
jawbone Online content
Freak of Nature
jawbone  Online Content
Freak of Nature
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 25,884
Fayetteville TN Via Selma
There are attorneys, especially in Florida, that specialize in Geriatric Issues. I'd find one of those to consult with.


Lord, please help us get our nation straightened out.
Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3227854
09/25/20 02:30 PM
09/25/20 02:30 PM
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 451
Grant, AL
W
woodsnwater Offline
4 point
woodsnwater  Offline
4 point
W
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 451
Grant, AL
If you have given all your property and money to your children and your in a nursing home who pays the bills?

Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: woodsnwater] #3227886
09/25/20 03:26 PM
09/25/20 03:26 PM
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 4,135
alabama
B
BigEd Offline
10 point
BigEd  Offline
10 point
B
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 4,135
alabama
Originally Posted by woodsnwater
If you have given all your property and money to your children and your in a nursing home who pays the bills?



Medicaid, once you apply and get on it. Someone will need to pay until such time that Medicaid takes over, can take months.

Re: Aging parents & finances [Re: Beer Belly] #3227888
09/25/20 03:29 PM
09/25/20 03:29 PM
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 7,784
Montgomery, AL
Hunting-231 Offline
14 point
Hunting-231  Offline
14 point
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 7,784
Montgomery, AL
Get an attorney that specializes in that area.


"The struggle you're in today, is developing the strength you need for tomorrow."
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