an oak axe handle would do wonders for his looks...

Navy SEALs are always taught

1) Keep your priorities in order and 2) Know when to act without hesitation.

A Navy SEAL was attending some college courses between assignments. He had completed missions in Iraq and Afghanistan. One of the courses had a professor who was an avowed atheist and a member of the ACLU. One day he shocked the class when he came in, looked to the ceiling, and flatly stated, "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you exactly 15 minutes."

The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop. Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, "Here I am God. I'm still waiting."

It got down to the last couple of minutes when the SEAL got out of his chair, went up to the professor, and cold-cocked him; knocking him off the platform. The professor was out cold. The SEAL went back to his seat and sat there, silently. The other students were shocked and stunned and sat there looking on in silence.

The professor eventually came to, noticeably shaken, looked at the SEAL and asked, "What the hell is the matter with you? Why did you do that?"

The SEAL calmly replied, "God was too busy today protecting America's soldiers who are protecting your right to say stupid chit and act like an arsehole. So He sent me."

BS, he put that crap on his resume so no husky farmers daughter would bitch slap him. I'd be more prone to think his specialty is tongue fu on a male partner.

This that ghey fella that was gonna show us all when he showed up to teach in heels. He should be placed in a mental health facility as he is obviously a sick sick human.

No, I seem to remember that in a story about him/her/it.

But ever since I got a little training way back when, I’m a staunch advocate of the “7-yard rule”.

Some instructors call it the 21 foot doctrine.

Point of no return.

Some things tend to fix themselves. Just be patient.

He claims to be trained somehow or another. Hard to fathom with no muscle tone. Idk....I do know I'd not worry about his abilities with shoulders like a 5 year old boy.

Sup Paul?

We had a female Marine in MCMAP who only weighed about 100#.
She wasn't strong, but she was like fighting the business end of a weedeater.
When you finally got ahold of her, you wanted to let go real quick. 🤔

That Jarhead spider monkey would kill him.

He wouldn't say war eagle. The war part wigged him out

That why I had to shoot Massey that night.

He also said he would not say "Go War Eagles". Nobody says that chit anyway! The Phuking idiot has no clue. Phuck Auburn for hiring him!

We had Updyke,y'all have Goldberg. (Too soon?)

The 21 foot rule is absolutely real and untrained folks would be shocked at how fast a brokedown decrepit fat man can stabify you with a blade.

The humanities section of all universities is packed with these folks. Nationwide. It's starting to leak into other sections of universities.

In the 1960's, the russians said they would just infiltrate our government run education system and bring us communism from within. We all laughed but damned if they didn't get it done. Took 5 times as long as it should have and it only works half assed but that's about normal for commies.

Who are the idiots that were conducting the interview and when it was over said WOW! THIS is the guy we have been searching for out of all the applicants. I feel great about this hire. THIS guy has what it takes and we want him to teach our young students and represent this University in a manner that makes us proud. How did the Bama fans get past security and conduct that interview?

I'm willing to bet the interview committee said, "well, maybe he can't be any worse than our other applicants"

I mean, if you're interviewing a guy for, “Lecturer of African American & American Literature and Composition in the English department ", then you're pretty much just making up a job to fill a space.
You've reached the very bottom of the education barrel, and you're not expecting anymore than a waste of skin with a single digit IQ.

I just sent my email to the Auburn president.