Just a couple of points.

1. As the Husband and Father, you are charged with being the spiritual leader of your household. It is your responsibility to have your family in regular fellowship with other Believers. There is something wrong if someone says they are part of the body of Christ but make no effort to be part of it.

2. Churches are filled with people every Sunday who proclaim to be Believers but show no difference in their behavior apart from those who are not. "Be holy, for I am holy". If someone does not desire holiness in their language, the things they post on Facebook or Aldeer, desire time in the Word, are they truly saved?

This.

I guess I look at it this way, how many of us show up at church the next day, bible in hand, after cussing like a madman the day before when our team fumbles the ball? Count me in that group. I know I'm a sinner. Try not to be but I fail every day. I serve an amazing God who, besides granting me eternal life, also erases my sins every day when I ask him for forgiveness. Fur, our preacher at FBC Montgomery has said that same thing from the pulpit regarding having room for one more hypocrite. Basically, he's saying we are a church full of sinners by our nature and there is always room for another one. Always gets a chuckle from the congregation!

To the OP, you gotta go where you are being fed a healthy dose of God's word every time you enter the door of the church. It's not a building. People make the church and if you feel love and acceptance in that congregation, then go for it. Also, give folks a break initially. You may end up sitting next to someone that may not seem all that warm but you don't know their circumstance in life. The next week, you may meet some of the most wonderful people on earth!

Bless you, man and good luck in your quest to find a new church home.

Dr. B

Just to make something clear. I’m am 100% a sinner and no better than anyone else who walks through the door of ANY church. I didn’t specify this in my original post and just reread and can see how it could be construed that way. When we were actively involved with the church I was ACTIVE but I wouldn’t ever stand in front of the congregation to lead prayer. I always felt my actions outside of church wasn’t good enough to do so. I would however do the announcements or help with the Lords Supper. While it may not be right that’s my feelings on the situation. I’m not good enough.

So please don’t misconstrue my initial post as “I’m better than everyone else”.

In regards to musical instruments, well it will be a change. The Bible says

100 Make a joyful noise unto the Lord, all ye lands.

2 Serve the Lord with gladness: come before his presence with singing.

3 Know ye that the Lord he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.

4 Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name.

5 For the Lord is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations.

And it also says:

Deuteronomy 4:2 New International Version (NIV)

2 Do not add to what I command you and do not subtract from it, but keep the commands of the Lord your God that I give you.


So does musical instruments fall into this category? I’m not a biblical scholar so I may have overlooked other scriptures that pertain.


Lastly the FBC we may attend isn’t a “hell, Fire and brimstone church” and I’m pretty sure most of the women wear makeup at both churches.

Psalm 150 King James Version (KJV)
1 Praise ye the Lord. Praise God in his sanctuary: praise him in the firmament of his power.

2 Praise him for his mighty acts: praise him according to his excellent greatness.

3 Praise him with the sound of the trumpet: praise him with the psaltery and harp.

4 Praise him with the timbrel and dance: praise him with stringed instruments and organs.

5 Praise him upon the loud cymbals: praise him upon the high sounding cymbals.

6 Let every thing that hath breath praise the Lord. Praise ye the Lord.

I know what you are saying Josh and never took it as you thought you were better than everybody else. It’s a difficult thing to change your church family. I can tell by your post that you are a stand up fella and a family man. And I’m sure it will all work out for you and your family no matter what you decide on.

Thank you. I actually have no issues with a choir, organ or piano as long as singing along is acceptable. It would take some getting used to though lol.

Thanks buddy. When I leave this world I want to be remembered as a good man, husband and father. It’s not easy. My language has worsened over the years but I actually try to not curse on here. I guess I have a little conscience left.

Lots of good replies from some good guys on here. Lots of honest replies too. If you feel led to leave your current church, then hopefully you’ll also be led to a new church home. There’s a lot of good folks in Baptist churches... where I attend in Huntsville there’s a lot of good folks. We’re all sinners, and we all know it. Thankfully we are saved by the blood of Jesus. Pray about it, and let the Lord lead.

With all due respect, God commands believers to gather so regularly that is becomes a habit. He doesn't give us the option to opt out if we think others are there for the wrong reasons. I'm glad God doesn't expect us to judge motives. We tend to judge the outside appearances but only God can know the heart.

"...not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching." Hebrews 10:25

Just remember 2 Peter 2:21:
For it would have been better for them not to have known the way of righteousness, than having known it, to turn from the holy commandment delivered to them.

I grew up in the Methodist Church.
Wife grew up in CoC
We split the difference and go to a Baptist church.

Hunterbuck, that was Old Testament scripture and not New Testament. No mention in New and therefore not practiced.

I will never disparage any Christian Church and I feel confident that with the time you have spent in church, you will know if you are hearing the gospel spoken.

The Bible is the word of God. Church denominations are the creation of man. Follow God's word no matter what man made church you attend.

Praise/Worship comes from the heart.... when you start defining whether to use instruments or not you’re being legalistic and similar to the Pharisees.

The beauty of the new covenant (the gospel) is the availability to all and it’s simplicity..... repent, believe and confess his name as Lord (believer’s baptism).

Romans 10:9

And the word of God may very well lead you away from certain churches, just as it may lead you to other churches.

Right there with you. I was saved in a COC and went there for 8 years. Switched to Southern Baptist about 8-9 years ago and haven’t looked back. I didn’t read all the above posts but depending on if you went to a conservative or liberal COC, as well as how modern the Baptist Church you’re looking at, will determine how much of a shock you will be in for. The biggest things you’ll notice is the music and the difference in belief of baptism being a requirement for salvation. I’ve actually never agreed with the COC on this one. Not to start an argument about it but here is where I stand. Yes, there are areas in the Bible where it says to be baptized during instructions for salvation but then there are other areas where it doesn’t. Here is my biggest hang up. Who saves us? God/Jesus. Who baptizes us? MAN. So, if the physical act of baptism, by man, is a sure enough requirement for salvation, then that would mean that God needs man to save man. I just don’t believe that. Shoot me a PM if I can be of any help during this phase. Like I said, I made the exact same move.

There are many great local churches around. In my opinion a great local churches will show evidence of really focusing on several key things.
1. Be: Christ centered. Gospel driven. Spirit filled. This absolutely as the identity of the church in all areas from the pulpit to bible studies to various ministries. Unwavering commitment to the Gospel of Christ.
2. Ministry of discipleship to the church body and to the local community, state, nation and the world. Equipping believers and sharing the Good News.
3. Creating an environment of spirit and truth and unity within the church with a fierce opposition to the worldliness that erodes and so permeates our culture.
4. Be welcoming to those searching for Truth.
5. Be known for Love. Love covers a multitude of sins.

I believe not enough emphasis is put on going out and ministering to others. The church I grew up in wanted the pastor to be there for them. They would wonder why they didn't have people knocking the doors down to visit the church but they never understood it was because they didn't minister to their communities outside of the church. Straycat hit the main points I would use as a reference.
I see guys all the time (many on here) that say the woods is their church. When people ask me if they have to go to church to be a Christian I ask them do you have to play golf to be a golfer. I truly believe a true Christian will want to be in fellowship with other believers as often as possible. I'm not saying you can't be around sinners (that's how you reach them) but you should desire to assemble with "like minded" people to build each other up in Godly principles.

Make sure the church teaches the main biblical beliefs you have and don't teach any unbiblical teachings.

I'm around quite a few CoC people because we are part of Birmingham Tres Dias which is like the Emmaus Walk. What I see "traditional" CoC guys that first attend it is men standing and worshiping to music with instruments and having communion at other buildings other than the Church. They also have issue with not having instant water baptism and the presence of a cross in the room where we have some of our talks. I enjoy hearing why people believe what they do and it's opened my eyes to why people are stuck in their beliefs. (me included)

I have been Church of God my whole life. My brother is a Baptist pastor in Calera. We have both been saved by the blood of the lamb and denomination isn't an issue between us at all. As stated before, denominations are a way for Christians to be divided. The devil wants us to be divided as well as our families. Don't let him win. Stay in the presence of God wherever you go. Btw, I'm a Christian saved by grace, I may fail but I don't reference myself as a sinner, but a Christian constantly asking forgiveness daily for any sin I may have allowed to enter my life.

Instrumental music was commanded in the OT, singing is commanded in the NT (2 Chron 29:25-28, Eph 5:19). The early church understood the command and they only sang. Instrumental music was not added in any type of Christian worship (true or otherwise) until several centuries after the establishment of the Church. Baptism is for the remission of sins (Acts 2:38). Once a person is saved, they can be lost (2 Pet 2:20-21, I Cor 15:1-2, James 5:19-20. Nowhere in scripture do we have any command or example of someone accepting Christ into their heart or being told to only believe or say a "sinner's prayer". Many sincere people, who call Jesus their Lord, who work for Him and that believe in Him will be lost (Matt 7:21ff). The Lord's supper was observed the first day of every week in the first century church which is in agreement with scriptures.

The time will come when people will seek out teachers that will tell them what they want to hear, and will turn their ears away from the truth and will turn to fables (2 Tim 4:3-4).

God is to be worshipped in truth, and truth only comes from God's word (Jn 4:23-24, 17:17).

A lot of good advice in this thread. One thing I would add how much of an emphasis does the church put on children's and youth ministries. That was the main thing I was looking for when I changed churches 3 years ago. Imo if a church puts children's ministries on the back burner it's a dying church. YOU DO NOT GET THIS TIME BACK WITH YOUR CHILDREN!

Boy, sounds like I wouldn't be wanted at y'alls churches.