This

Haha you got that right. I got a good one. She’s a crazy Cajun but she’s got some sense

I’ve learned to stay in my chair until she’s walking out the door otherwise I’d sitting in the truck for 15 minutes waiting on her

I waited on my last one to be ready and opened the door for her, like a proper gentleman.

When we pull up to a store, restaurant or other place, now I just turn the Jeep off and sit there. After she piddles for a few minutes, then she realizes that I haven't moved, she looks at me and goes...

"What are you sitting there for?"

I say...

"I'm waiting on you to get out of the car before I move."

I do the same thing when we're getting ready to go anywhere. This is why women always drive so fast and tailgate you, it's because they are always late to where they are going, because they piddled around at the house too long before they left.

Women are the biggest piddlers I have ever seen. It takes them 4 times as long to do something than it takes a man. (And that's being generous.) It don't matter what task it is.

Men = Hurry up and wait (Like the military.)

Women = Piddle and the Piddle some more.

I don't even start getting ready to go until she says she is ready! It is ridiculous the shenanigans she goes through, to get out of the house. Then she forgets something and has to get my keys (can't find hers in that god awful purse). Then she will be in the house for 10 minutes, doing who knows what or maybe on the phone with someone that calls. I just hit xm radio 70's on 7 and chill out...then I blow the horn when she walks in front of the truck...she hates that!!!

I think there's a song about the OP.



We've been married since 85. Still get the door for her most times.

Mine is slow - i usually always ahead

Getting out of car it semi aggravating - i stand and wait and wait - then finally she out and closes the door then i can lock it

This topic is absolutely hilarious to me - because there are soooooooo many things that are absolutely spot on.

Twice a month I am on parking/security detail at our church, which typically means that I have to be at our church pretty early, if I am the primary 45-minutes before the service and if I am an assistant 35-minutes before the service. Every Saturday before the Sunday that I serve, I remind my wonderful wife that we need to leave at x-time.

Without exception - EVERY SINGLE Sunday I make us breakfast and EVERY SINGLE time I am waiting on her. When we leave the house she says, "Well the reason we are running late is because I had to clean the kitchen." When we pull into the parking lot she says the same thing, "See - I told you we weren't going to be late." On more than one occasion I have left her at the house and we drove separate to church, which means that she always gets the parking spot furthest from the door (which I intentionally plan) - which makes me feel pretty good inside

almost 100% ditto. Preach

Just this afternoon we had somewhere to be and I ask “when will you be ready?” Her reply “I’m ready now” and she was standing 4’ from the front door. She then turns and walks toward the kitchen and laundry room INSTEAD OF WALKING OUT OF THE DOOR. I walked on out to the car. About 7-8 minutes later she finally shows up! I didn’t say anything. So we reach our destination I park and get out and stand there for a couple of minutes and then she finally gets out. I didn’t say anything but it really burns my a$$.

What really pisses me off is when they wait until you park to film down the sun visor and check out their makeup, hair, etc. things they could have done the last mile or two before reaching your destination.

I could go on but it’s useless, 99% of women are like this and they’re not changing.

Gentlemen, I apparently married a Unicorn.
She's rarely late and when she is there is an actual reason...not being slow, distracted and poor planning.
She doesn't linger at home or in the car, heck I have to be on my A game to keep up.
She's pretty low maintenance.
She will always go do something in the laundry room or kitchen before we go anywhere though, but somehow she has it planned out because I rarely ever have to wait on her at all.

Same here. My wife cannot stand to be late.

There was an episode on "Everyone loves raymond" where raymond told deborah "if you are not ready in 5 minutes, i am leaving without you. She wasnt ready and he left her. BIG mistake!

Mine is the same. She hates being late. We have a rule that we tried to instill in our kids. If you ain’t 10 minutes early, you’re late. She lives by that 9/10 times.

Now the gas light is a different story. She plays Russian roulette with that thing on the regular.

Oh my gosh don't get me started on that. I hear this regularly.... "I've got to get gas this morning. I HOPE I make it to the gas station". Drives me insane.

Get in her car to go somewhere

Me: We need to get fuel your light is on
Her: nah I can go 50 miles after it has come on
Me: what was the mileage when it came on?
Her: … well we can stop if you think we need to.

Ain't it grand to have a great one to complain about? Lord, thank you so much for bringing me this treasure. Forgive me for my complaints, I see the splinter in her eye, but miss the log in mine. Thank you so much Lord, you knew exactly the one I needed, thank you for closing the doors on the others.

No. My ex was late for everything, low fuel light in her car was always on and kept every clock in our house set 10 minutes fast.
New one is the exact opposite and I like it

I've never understood the whole thing about setting a clock forward. She knows it's ten minutes fast so she tells herself, Oh I've still got ten minutes. Then they are still late. Mine is notorious about the gas light as well. She will run it all the way down till the miles till empty goes blank. If we ever go anywhere and she says we can take her car the first thing out of my mouth is does it have gas in it?

When it comes time to go to bed, her definition of let's go to bed is to lay there for an hour and flip through FB and Instagram posts on her phone.