This topic is absolutely hilarious to me - because there are soooooooo many things that are absolutely spot on.

Twice a month I am on parking/security detail at our church, which typically means that I have to be at our church pretty early, if I am the primary 45-minutes before the service and if I am an assistant 35-minutes before the service. Every Saturday before the Sunday that I serve, I remind my wonderful wife that we need to leave at x-time.

Without exception - EVERY SINGLE Sunday I make us breakfast and EVERY SINGLE time I am waiting on her. When we leave the house she says, "Well the reason we are running late is because I had to clean the kitchen." When we pull into the parking lot she says the same thing, "See - I told you we weren't going to be late." On more than one occasion I have left her at the house and we drove separate to church, which means that she always gets the parking spot furthest from the door (which I intentionally plan) - which makes me feel pretty good inside