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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 4,229 Likes: 7
10 point
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10 point
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 4,229 Likes: 7 |
11 is a little young for LSD IMO. I dont know if it was the LSD or something I caught in Saudi Arabia.
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 1,992
8 point
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8 point
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 1,992 |
-Don't let your mouth write a check your a$$ can't cover.
Dr. B
This is a good one. My mouth still writes those checks.
"The future's uncertain and the end is always near"
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 44,398 Likes: 29
Freak of Nature
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Freak of Nature
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 44,398 Likes: 29 |
Couple more classics "Because I said so".
When you kids Ask "what for?"...... "Cat fur to make kitten britchs, thats whats for"
LUCK:::; When presistence, dedication, perspiration and preparation meet up with opportunity!!!
- - - - - - - -A government big enough to give you everything you want, is big enough to take everything you have. Thomas Jeferson - - - - - - - -
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Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 17,297 Likes: 24
Old Mossy Horns
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Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 17,297 Likes: 24 |
You fulla blue water....  never have found out what that one meant...
Did you know that Beer Nutz are over a Dollar...and Deer Nutz are under a Buck...
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Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 9,375
14 point
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14 point
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 9,375 |
In order to determine the sex of an unborn baby. Simply tie a ring on a string and apparently whether it spins righty or lefty determines if its a boy or girl
This is completely wrong. Everyone knows all babies are born male and they just knock the peckers off the crazy ones 
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Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 9,564 Likes: 21
14 point
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14 point
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 9,564 Likes: 21 |
Chew on a Southern Spined Ash tree branch and it will stop a tooth ache. I have always heard it referred to as Indian Toothache trees.
Another old saying we always used to go by was the signs. We always castrated hogs and cattle when the sign was right. Never have any surgery when the sign isn't right or you can bleed to death.
I can't stand a thief.
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Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 17,297 Likes: 24
Old Mossy Horns
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Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 17,297 Likes: 24 |
Static cling free sheets in your campers cushions will keep the bugs out... 
Did you know that Beer Nutz are over a Dollar...and Deer Nutz are under a Buck...
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Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 13,401
Booner
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Booner
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 13,401 |
The ring on a string deal over your wrist works...my two girls were predicted as well as us doing it to several other couples we know. They all came out right.
Last edited by TChunter; 04/17/14 04:33 PM.
On the Eighth day God created flounder.
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Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 40,051 Likes: 135
Freak of Nature
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Freak of Nature
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 40,051 Likes: 135 |
Here's an oldie my Grandmaw would say about someone bragging on their kids or grandkids.
"Every old crow thinks his little uns are the blackest".
"Why do you ask"?
Too many people spend money they don't have , on things they don't need, to impress people they don't know.
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Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 13,401
Booner
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Booner
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 13,401 |
Your grandma was a racist. 
On the Eighth day God created flounder.
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Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 7,159
14 point
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14 point
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 7,159 |
When my mom (she's 90 now - that's unimportant but it shows how old this remedy is) was a little girl she got a wart on her index finger. The family maid, who had grandparents who were slaves (this remedy is supposed to come from slave folklore), mixed up a salve of a few kitchen ingredients and bacon grease. She covered the wart in the salve and then wrapped the hair from a horse's tail around it several times and tied it off. That was wrapped in a linen bandage and left untouched for 5 days. The wart fell off and never grew back. Calf dehorning paste will get rid of one in 10 minutes if you're a big enough boy to stand the pain for the last 7 minutes Dang, Fur! What the crap is in that stuff?
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Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 40,051 Likes: 135
Freak of Nature
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Freak of Nature
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 40,051 Likes: 135 |
Your grandma was a racist. Only to crows that weren't black. 
"Why do you ask"?
Too many people spend money they don't have , on things they don't need, to impress people they don't know.
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Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 9,285 Likes: 11
14 point
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14 point
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 9,285 Likes: 11 |
Dont let that mockingbird mouth overload that hummingbird a $$
Give me bout 15 more minutes, I was dreamin about beavers..........
Si Robertson
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 27,511 Likes: 29
Talking Turkey
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Talking Turkey
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 27,511 Likes: 29 |
My grandmother would eat Vaseline for stomach ulcers and diverticulitis. I was sitting there one day as a teenager and she had a Sams size jar of Vaseline sitting on the counter. I made a comment on it and she said "Oh, that reminds me" and took a spoon and got a big scoop and swallowed it. I wish I had the look on my face when I saw that one for the first time.
My grandad would use horse liniment on his knees when they hurt.
Tomato juice bath for poison Ivy. Clorox bath for chiggers.
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Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 7,159
14 point
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14 point
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 7,159 |
My grandmother would eat Vaseline for stomach ulcers and diverticulitis. I was sitting there one day as a teenager and she had a Sams size jar of Vaseline sitting on the counter. I made a comment on it and she said "Oh, that reminds me" and took a spoon and got a big scoop and swallowed it....
My mom and grandmother both put a fingerful of Vick's Salve in their mouth way back between their cheek and gums at bedtime to clear their sinuses while they slept.
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 16,945 Likes: 46
Old Mossy Horns
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Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 16,945 Likes: 46 |
My grandmother would eat Vaseline for stomach ulcers and diverticulitis. I was sitting there one day as a teenager and she had a Sams size jar of Vaseline sitting on the counter. I made a comment on it and she said "Oh, that reminds me" and took a spoon and got a big scoop and swallowed it. I wish I had the look on my face when I saw that one for the first time.
My grandad would use horse liniment on his knees when they hurt.
Tomato juice bath for poison Ivy. Clorox bath for chiggers. I bet she was never constipated
We will burn that bridge when we get there
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