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155 members (CNC, 7PTSPREAD, walt4dun, brokefixer, Cuz-Pat, m97, CAL, jdhunter2011, Jdkprp70, Turkeytrott82, BobK, BamaGuitarDude, MoeBuck, rutwad, Driveby, AU7MM08, TwoRs, Dubie, AUjerbear, skoor, Bake, Hunting-231, ronfromramer, ts1979flh, HBWALKER14, South Ala Hunter, Holcomb, GomerPyle, Ben2, 3006bullet, odocoileus, BrandonClark, Aldecks1, AU67Skeeter, Double Creek2, jmj120, bwbrookie, Gut Pile 32, MountainTopHunter, dirtwrk, rrice0725, GrandSlam, cartervj, Okatuppa, furnfeather, Lightfoot, hippi, JDW25, Remington270, MarkCollin, Young20, DGAMBLER, WEMOhunter, woodduck, jellyhead11, HawkPilot, bug54, Geeb, Jwoods32, desertdog, Calvin, Exhoosier, Headhunter1984, donia, Honcho, ALclearcut, BigAl, deadeye48, CeeHawk37, Bamarich2, Skullworks, BhamFred, cch, coldtrail, Camden86, thayerp81, Canterberry, Chiller, trlrdrdave, Bustinbeards, Jarhead79, JSanford1974, quailman, ozarktroutbum, longshot, Omega One, BCD, Priority, Raven, BD, JA, NVM1031, Floorman1, foldemup, akbejeepin, inatree, TurkeyJoe, Mully, somedude, demop_native, CKyleC, BibbCo, Turkeyneck78, Beer Belly, Mack1, twaldrop4, skymech, WPZJR, Downwind, gobblebox, WGDfarm23, fourfive45, Fishduck, seapro19, shootnmiss, ShaftOne, AU coonhunter, HDS64, IMISSALDEER, paulfish4570, UncleHuck, Clayton, RidgeRanger, Bowfish, mdavis, Signal26, Six shooter, MoonLightGunner, Kang, bfoote, Irishguy, Beadlescomb, Mulcher, Happysappy, BPI, doc bar, 19 invisible),
816
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Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 11,328 Likes: 28
Booner
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Booner
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 11,328 Likes: 28 |
More nervous than a rat in the *hit house
I don't no more believe that than a man on the moon
He's crazy as a bessy bug
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 15,586 Likes: 96
Old Mossy Horns
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Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 15,586 Likes: 96 |
Sweating like a whore in church..
Life is a journey. Make sure and bring plenty of Beer.
My luck has been so bad lately, it could be raining pussies and I'd catch one with a dick broke off in it.
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Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 8,039 Likes: 7
14 point
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14 point
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 8,039 Likes: 7 |
She's got an ass like a government mule
A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams
He alone is educated who has learned the lessons of open-mindedness
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 15,586 Likes: 96
Old Mossy Horns
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Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 15,586 Likes: 96 |
She's so bucktoothed she could eat an ear of corn through a picket fence.
Life is a journey. Make sure and bring plenty of Beer.
My luck has been so bad lately, it could be raining pussies and I'd catch one with a dick broke off in it.
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Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 519
4 point
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4 point
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 519 |
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Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 519
4 point
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4 point
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 519 |
So bucktoothed could eat peanuts out of a can
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Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 12,466 Likes: 62
Booner
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Booner
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 12,466 Likes: 62 |
These are some that I have heard some of my grand-parents use in years gone by.
I've been busier than a one legged man in a butt kicking contest.
I've been busier than a three legged cat in a sandbox.
Don't worry about the mule going blind, just load the wagon and I'll shake the lines.
Boy, what are you doing just standing there? You look like a calf looking at a new gate.
_________is so ugly they'd have to tie a pork chop around their neck just to get the dogs to play with them.
If you can't run with the big dawgs, you just need to stay on the porch.
Son, let's go sit out on the pi-ezzird a while. (meaning the front porch)
I need to stop and shake the dew off of my lily. (meaning I need to pee)
I need to bleed my lizard. (another I need to pee)
Cuz-Pat
Patton's European Mounts
Professional Quality Skull & Antler Taxidermy
Since 1998
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Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 37
spike
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spike
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 37 |
So bow-legged couldn't hem a hog in a ditch
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Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 693
4 point
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4 point
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 693 |
I'd pi$$ on a spark plug, if I thought it would do any good.
If I got any happier I would have to sit on my hands to keep from waving at folks.
Bare footed as a yard dog.
Tis better to have it, and not need it, than need it,and not have it.
Queer as a seven dollar bill.
Beauty is only skin deep, well somebody better skin her.
"Grits ain't groceries, eggs ain't poultry,and Mona Lisa was a man"
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 16,909 Likes: 41
Old Mossy Horns
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Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 16,909 Likes: 41 |
Naked as a jaybird
Shes so ugly she could snag forked lightning and run it up a tree backwards
Sorer than a blistered p*ssy in a pecker patch
I'm gonns beat you like a red headed step child
It would be a good day to be a duck (if it's storming)
Ain't worth killing
You shaking like a hound dog crapping peach seeds
Ashes to ashes dust to dust if it wasn't for women our peckers would rust
Finer than a frogs hair split four ways
Buy you school books send you to school and all you wanna do is play with the teachers ass. An he's a man
We will burn that bridge when we get there
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 16,909 Likes: 41
Old Mossy Horns
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Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 16,909 Likes: 41 |
My stomach is as tore up as a soup sammich
He/she's so country there breath smells like stove wood.
I wish I could remember all of them. I always worked around older folks and forgot more of them than I can remember.
We were working on a scaffold on the ua campus about 60-70 foot up on the air and we see this big Ol gal walking down the side walk and this old man said," she's so big she burns diesel." I about fell off the scaffold from laughing
We will burn that bridge when we get there
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Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 30,089 Likes: 46
Administrator
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Administrator
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 30,089 Likes: 46 |
His luck is so bad if it was raining p***y he would pick up one with a pecker in it.
"I hate rude behavior in a man. I won't tolerate it." Captain Woodrow F. Call
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Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 12,466 Likes: 62
Booner
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Booner
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 12,466 Likes: 62 |
When asked "how are you doing"...
...If I was any better I'd be twins.
Cuz-Pat
Patton's European Mounts
Professional Quality Skull & Antler Taxidermy
Since 1998
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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 624 Likes: 1
4 point
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4 point
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 624 Likes: 1 |
That ol boy is as messed up as a box of worms.
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,816 Likes: 1
8 point
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8 point
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,816 Likes: 1 |
That boy is wasting good air some ole mangey dog could be breathing
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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,423
10 point
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10 point
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,423 |
"I am busier than a cat covering sh#t and you are asking me questions"
"That looks like a hogs a$$ sewed up with barb wire"
But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?
Mark Twain
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Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,159 Likes: 6
10 point
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10 point
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,159 Likes: 6 |
Come on boys, we are burning daylight here.
I am so hungry I could eat a bear fried in tar.
Grandma said...Always keep a gun close at hand, you just never know when you might run across some varmint that needs killing...
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Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 2,189 Likes: 14
8 point
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8 point
Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 2,189 Likes: 14 |
Looks like a billy goats butt sewed up with barb wire.
Happier than a puppy with two peters.
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Joined: May 2008
Posts: 979
6 point
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6 point
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 979 |
Song from old HeeHaw program If it weren't fer bad luck I'd have no luck at all Glum despear and angony on me
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Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 92
spike
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spike
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 92 |
harder than Chinese rithmatic
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