These are some that I have heard some of my grand-parents use in years gone by.
I've been busier than a one legged man in a butt kicking contest.
I've been busier than a three legged cat in a sandbox.
Don't worry about the mule going blind, just load the wagon and I'll shake the lines.
Boy, what are you doing just standing there? You look like a calf looking at a new gate.
_________is so ugly they'd have to tie a pork chop around their neck just to get the dogs to play with them.
If you can't run with the big dawgs, you just need to stay on the porch.
Son, let's go sit out on the pi-ezzird a while. (meaning the front porch)
I need to stop and shake the dew off of my lily. (meaning I need to pee)
I need to bleed my lizard. (another I need to pee)
