ATTENTION ATTENTION:::;WE HAVE 2 MISSING PERSONS IN ALABAMA.
FIRST ONE IS A 14 YEAR OLD MALE NAMED MTEAGUE.HE WAS LAST SEEN RUNNING OUTTA THE GROCERY STORE WITH PORK CHOPS HANGING OUTTA HIS PANTS.HE WAS WEARING CAMO SPEEDOS AND FISHNET STOCKINGS.
2ND MISSING PERSON IS A 6 YEAR OLD MALE NAMED DTEAGUE.HE WAS LAST SEEN COMING OUTTA BANANA REPUBLIC MUMBLING SOMETHING ABOUT THEM EFFERS NOT SELLING BANANAS.HE WAS WEARING PINK AND YELLOW SPONGEBOB JAMMYS AND CANNOT READ OR WRITE SO YOU MUST TALK VERY SLOW IF YOU APPROACH HIM.
ANY INFO ON THE WHEREABOUTS WOULDNT REALLY MATTER SINCE WE REALLY DONT CARE THAT THEIR MISSING.
YOU MAY RETURN TO YOUR SCHEDULED PROGRAM.
