FIFY!
Ole BhamFred greeted his wife every morning with a thunderous fart before getting out of bed.
Betty kept telling him, BhamFred some day you are going to crap your guts out straining like that and I am tired of waking up to that foul stench.
BhamFred didn't care as that was his way of starting the day off on the right foot.
Betty growing really tired of this devised a plan to make BhamFred quit.
On Thanksgiving morning Betty woke up early to begin cooking the feast. As she was removing the gibblets from the turkey she got the idea. She snuck upstairs and put the giblets in BhamFred's shorts. About the normal time she heard BhamFreds morning fart. Shortly after she heard BhamFred let out a real anxious scream.
Barely able to contain herself she went upstairs to "check" on BhamFred and see what was wrong.
She entered the room and Fred was sitting up leaning against the headboard looking kinda pale.
Betty was dying inside but managed to keep a straight face. Why BhamFred, what is wrong!?!
Ole BhamFred says in a shaky voice:
Betty, after all these years you were right. When I farted I $#@! my guts out.
By the grace of God and these 2 fingers though. I got them all back in!!
Betty still hasn't stopped laughing!!