thanks for all the suggestions. ended up setting up with Wilson Dentistry out in Morris. they are the rare breed that can handle kids without drugging them up, strapping them down and forcing the kid to be left with complete strangers during a traumatic experience. so far they seem to be super nice folks and are very accommodating so if anyone is looking for a more humane experience they may be the answer youre looking for... or I may be back here in a couple weeks hating their guts and trying again, who knows. grin