There was this bird. He waited a bit too long to fly south for the winter. As he flew snow and ice set in on his wings and he crashed to earth into a cow pasture.
Snow and ice continued to build up until he was neck deep. Hypothermia set in. Minutes before the poor bird froze to death a cow wandered by an pooped a warm pile of **** on the bird.
The warmth of the poopoo began to thaw the snow and ice out. Life began to flow back into the bird. The bird began to squirm and wiggle and shout and yell .... 'Im going to live" ... "Im going to make it" ..... he continued to get excited about being given a second chance at life .... he continued to cause a commotion in an effort to work himself free so he could continue on his flight south.
The commotion caught the attention of the local farm cat. The cat walked over to the bird. The cat reached down with one claw, plucked the bird up out of the snow, ice and warm poopoo, tossed the bird in the air, caught the bird in it's mouth, and ate it.

The moral of the story is 3 fold ..........
1. Not everyone that ****s on you is your enemy
2. Not everyone that gets you out of **** is your friend
3. When you find yourself neck deep in a pile of ****, shut up and be still

My dad has told that for years. I love it.

Nice

Oldie but goody.