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Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860945
02/13/14 03:43 AM
02/13/14 03:43 AM
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 8,729
bessemer, al
H
hunterturf Online content
14 point
hunterturf  Online Content
14 point
H
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 8,729
bessemer, al
I went with my dad to hang a stand for me to bow hunt out of but had to cross soapstone creek. The slickest dang thing u have ever tried to walk on.we got it hung and I was racing back to the truck to drive back to the gate. SPLASH!!!! sitting in the middle of the creek I turn around to see if he saw me.... and of course he did

Fast forward 24 hours and I go to hunt this new stand. He dropped me off 300 yards from the creek at the edge of a big field and said he would pick me up THERE at dark. I was in pines and it was starting to get dark quick and for safety reasons only (a the fact that gill man lived in that creek) i start to get my crap together. On flippin que of my feet hitting the ground a pack of coyotes crank up several hundred yards away. Trent richardson wouldnt have been able to keep up as i sprinted out of that pine thicket!!!!! Down the road i go toward the creek. Remembering that i had failed a speedy crossing the day before i go from a healthy jog to a crawl as I stuck my boot in the water. Its at this point I hear something and look across the creek I see my dad.......he was of course laughing uncontrollably.....


Give me bout 15 more minutes, I was dreamin about beavers..........
Si Robertson
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860980
02/13/14 04:17 AM
02/13/14 04:17 AM
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 6,863
Tuscaloosa
Booger Offline
Picker
Booger  Offline
Picker
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 6,863
Tuscaloosa
Ok, here is just one of my Fraudian slips. The incident happened 10-11 years ago. It happened right after Alabama men's basketball team had made it to the sweet 16 or the elite 8 I don't remember. Anyway, Coach Godfrey and his family attended the same church we did. Well, we always sat in the back because our son can be loud due to his disability, the Godfrey gang always sat behind us. Well the Sunday after Alabama gets put out of the tournament Mark is back with family. During the meet and greet part of the service, yes Baptist, I say this to Mark, "Hey Mark, nice semen". I don't know why season came out semen. He didn't hear it, cause he just went right along thanking for support and stuff. I on the other hand was about to hyperventilate and crap my pants. I told my wife what happened and she had to get up and leave for laughing so hard. I never did ask Mark or Elizabeth about that. I have more stories but I don't want to overwhelm you guys with my stupidity.


Pick'n and a grin'n
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860984
02/13/14 04:20 AM
02/13/14 04:20 AM
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 9,035
Jasper
bama7x57 Offline
14 point
bama7x57  Offline
14 point
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 9,035
Jasper
I once informed the President of our company that he has something stuck on his forehead. He politely informed me he was Catholic and it was Ash Wednesday. My heart sank, but he was cool about it.


Take your kids hunting instead of hunting your kids.

I'd rather be LOST in the woods than FOUND in the city.

Drive a hybrid, I need your gas.

Your mind is your primary weapon. Never let it get rusty.
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #861021
02/13/14 05:00 AM
02/13/14 05:00 AM
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 13,401
Mobile Alabama
TChunter Offline
Booner
TChunter  Offline
Booner
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 13,401
Mobile Alabama
i have no embarrassing stories, everything in my life has been pre-calculated and with purpose.


On the Eighth day God created flounder.
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #861072
02/13/14 05:45 AM
02/13/14 05:45 AM
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 2,057
Alabama Wetumpka
Talltines Offline
on probation
Talltines  Offline
on probation
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 2,057
Alabama Wetumpka
Well There are a couple I can think Of. But this one happened a couple years ago so its still fresh in my mind. I was working nights at the Bartending at the Casino in Wetumpka and Guiding at my lodge. So after hunting season and I had a couple days off from the casino I was having trouble sleeping. Well the doc gave me sleeping pills. Now I was staying at the lodge with my dad and Wife. I can't sleep at all with clothes on. So I take the pill Fall asleep finally. The next morning I wake up expecting to roll over and see my wife nope there was my dad. I quickly jump up and ran to the room. Asked my dad about it that morning. He said well just figured she kicked your Arss out.


Hunting Is my Obsession, My Passion, My Everything, Oh so is my wife.
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #861075
02/13/14 05:47 AM
02/13/14 05:47 AM
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 36,091
alabama
BhamFred Online mad
Freak of Nature
BhamFred  Online Mad
Freak of Nature
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 36,091
alabama
not me, a guy I worked with once took his date home and they were "sitting" on the front porch wooden swing. His pants down, her legs stuck out the back of the swing, going at it. Swing broke. Girls legs broke. Everybody stuck, till dad came out the front door.......


I've spent most of the money I've made in my lifetime on hunting and fishing. The rest I just wasted.....

proud Cracker-Americaan

muslims are like coyotes, only good one is a dead one
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #861088
02/13/14 05:57 AM
02/13/14 05:57 AM
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 3,249
N. Alabama
Reyn Offline
10 point
Reyn  Offline
10 point
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 3,249
N. Alabama
I got called into court on an off day. Was sitting at the DAs table during opening statement of a felony DUI trial. Had a new phone in which my wife had downloaded some Journey song as her ringtone. As the DA is giving her opening statement it goes off in my shirt pocket and its loud. On top of that I am panicking and can't get it turned off. Finally I just cover it and squeeze til it quit ringing or I silenced it.

Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: BhamFred] #861097
02/13/14 06:01 AM
02/13/14 06:01 AM
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 12,018
chilton co.
trox28 Offline
on probation
trox28  Offline
on probation
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 12,018
chilton co.
Originally Posted By: BhamFred
not me, a guy I worked with once took his date home and they were "sitting" on the front porch wooden swing. His pants down, her legs stuck out the back of the swing, going at it. Swing broke. Girls legs broke. Everybody stuck, till dad came out the front door.......


Dammit man laugh

Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: BhamFred] #861099
02/13/14 06:04 AM
02/13/14 06:04 AM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 10,979
wedowee
daniel white Offline
Booner
daniel white  Offline
Booner
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 10,979
wedowee

Originally Posted By: BhamFred
not me, a guy I worked with once took his date home and they were "sitting" on the front porch wooden swing. His pants down, her legs stuck out the back of the swing, going at it. Swing broke. Girls legs broke. Everybody stuck, till dad came out the front door.......


laugh


"You do and it will be the biggest mistake you ever made, you Texas brush popper" John Wayne
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: daniel white] #861111
02/13/14 06:09 AM
02/13/14 06:09 AM
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 5,242
Central, AL
280Rem. Offline
12 point
280Rem.  Offline
12 point
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 5,242
Central, AL
Originally Posted By: daniel white
Aww, man I got some good ones sure is a lot of typing though.

Excuse the grammer

When I was 18, I went on a beach vacation for the first time ever with my girlfriend "now wife" family. They had a Condo down there that they went to ever year, It was called the Shores, now it the Escapes. Anyway, it only had two bedrooms, one with 2 full beds and one master room, they was both up stairs. So I told my in-laws that I would sleep on the couch down stairs, BUT nooooo they insisted that I sleep upstairs they trusted me and there daughter, that we could just wear pajamas and sleep in separate beds. HE HE HE, well it didn't exactly go down like that. About the third or fourth morning there, Southwire calls me for a job interview, well my phone is down stairs and I am up stairs, trying to burn the bearings out of it. So my MIL being the nice lady she is, does the ole no knock method. Well she saw a sight she didn't want to see, she drops my phone and takes off hollering and running. So hell I couldn't waste what energy I done used, so I finished what I was doing, got on the phone got a interview set up and went down to face some PISSED OFF parents. Ahh the good ole days.

rofl

Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: BhamFred] #861119
02/13/14 06:16 AM
02/13/14 06:16 AM
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 5,242
Central, AL
280Rem. Offline
12 point
280Rem.  Offline
12 point
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 5,242
Central, AL
Originally Posted By: BhamFred
not me, a guy I worked with once took his date home and they were "sitting" on the front porch wooden swing. His pants down, her legs stuck out the back of the swing, going at it. Swing broke. Girls legs broke. Everybody stuck, till dad came out the front door.......


That was a bad day.

Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #861125
02/13/14 06:21 AM
02/13/14 06:21 AM
Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 8,456
Harpersville, AL
tfd1224 Offline OP
14 point
tfd1224  Offline OP
14 point
Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 8,456
Harpersville, AL
Tall tines just reminded me of another one. I was working on an ambulance at this time and my wife and I were living with her mom and stepdad. Well I had had one of those 24 hour shifts on the ambulance where I got a grand total of about 15 minutes of sleep and I had to do something the next day too so I didn't sleep during the day. Well we go to sleep and I wake up to get in the shower in the morning and I am remembering a weird dream I had last night but it seemed so real. I got out of the shower and told my wife, she was my girlfriend then. I said I don't know if it really happened but I think I dreamed I woke up in your parents bed wearing nothing but my undies on my hands and knees between your mom and stepdad, then your stepdad wakes up and says what the f*** are you doing in our bed? Then your mom asks the same thing and I say hell I don't really know so I crawled over your mom, I mean straddled her and got out of the bed and came back in here. She said it must have been a dream because I never got out of bed. At 9:00 I was sitting at work and got a text saying it wasn't a dream. For 3 months until we finally closed on our house I got little prods like, well I guess we're going to go get the bed warm for nick and all kinds of crap like that. It was like the gift that kept on giving.


Yeah c’mon. Daniel White
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #861127
02/13/14 06:23 AM
02/13/14 06:23 AM
Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 2,044
etowah co.
shootnmiss Offline
8 point
shootnmiss  Offline
8 point
Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 2,044
etowah co.
Me my wife n three kids at acadamy on night. Id been dranking patron, stomach got tore up and I chit myself, BAD. It was running in my boots.
Had to ride home nekkid in back of truck in December.

Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #861128
02/13/14 06:24 AM
02/13/14 06:24 AM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 10,979
wedowee
daniel white Offline
Booner
daniel white  Offline
Booner
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 10,979
wedowee

Originally Posted By: tfd1224
Tall tines just reminded me of another one. I was working on an ambulance at this time and my wife and I were living with her mom and stepdad. Well I had had one of those 24 hour shifts on the ambulance where I got a grand total of about 15 minutes of sleep and I had to do something the next day too so I didn't sleep during the day. Well we go to sleep and I wake up to get in the shower in the morning and I am remembering a weird dream I had last night but it seemed so real. I got out of the shower and told my wife, she was my girlfriend then. I said I don't know if it really happened but I think I dreamed I woke up in your parents bed wearing nothing but my undies on my hands and knees between your mom and stepdad, then your stepdad wakes up and says what the f*** are you doing in our bed? Then your mom asks the same thing and I say hell I don't really know so I crawled over your mom, I mean straddled her and got out of the bed and came back in here. She said it must have been a dream because I never got out of bed. At 9:00 I was sitting at work and got a text saying it wasn't a dream. For 3 months until we finally closed on our house I got little prods like, well I guess we're going to go get the bed warm for nick and all kinds of crap like that. It was like the gift that kept on giving.


What the mom look like?? laugh lol


"You do and it will be the biggest mistake you ever made, you Texas brush popper" John Wayne
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: shootnmiss] #861129
02/13/14 06:25 AM
02/13/14 06:25 AM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 10,979
wedowee
daniel white Offline
Booner
daniel white  Offline
Booner
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 10,979
wedowee
Originally Posted By: shootnmiss
Me my wife n three kids at acadamy on night. Id been dranking patron, stomach got tore up and I chit myself, BAD. It was running in my boots.
Had to ride home nekkid in back of truck in December.


WTF?? are u for real? smile

Last edited by daniel white; 02/13/14 06:35 AM.

"You do and it will be the biggest mistake you ever made, you Texas brush popper" John Wayne
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: daniel white] #861147
02/13/14 06:34 AM
02/13/14 06:34 AM
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 15,950
Brierfield
Beadlescomb Offline
Old Mossy Horns
Beadlescomb  Offline
Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 15,950
Brierfield

Originally Posted By: daniel white

Originally Posted By: shootnmiss
Me my wife n three kids at acadamy on night. Id been dranking patron, stomach got tore up and I chit myself, BAD. It was running in my boots.
Had to ride home nekkid in back of truck in December.


WTF?? are u for real?


We've all been there


We will burn that bridge when we get there
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: shootnmiss] #861152
02/13/14 06:37 AM
02/13/14 06:37 AM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 15,547
Panhandle Florida
PaschalBD Offline
Used to be TiderBD
PaschalBD  Offline
Used to be TiderBD
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 15,547
Panhandle Florida
Me and a buddy are gonna fish in a tournament on a lake neither of us had fished before. Late one evening a couple weeks before the tournament we bust off to the lake to do a pre-fish. We fished all the way up till dark and had traveled several miles away from the launch. On our way back, I get a stomach cramp of epic proportions and tell my buddy to get me to shore ASAP. The boat gets to within feet of hard ground and I jump out and run for brush. I'm facing the water when a flood light comes on and I turn my head to see an entire family sitting at their dinner table in front of a giant picture glass window horrified by my appearance in half pinch. Man of the house comes out the door yelling and ask me if I had to do that in his yard as I'm jumping back in the boat, shorts around my ankles. Hung my butt of the back of the boat hanging onto the outboard and finished up.

Last edited by PaschalBD; 02/13/14 06:38 AM.

A servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ.


USAF Veteran
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: daniel white] #861153
02/13/14 06:37 AM
02/13/14 06:37 AM
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 2,725
Phenix City, Al.
DeerTracker Offline
10 point
DeerTracker  Offline
10 point
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 2,725
Phenix City, Al.
At kids little league ball game on motorcycle. Stomach cramping really bad And i knew i had to do something quickly. Went into bathroom at concession stand and I stool was out of order and the other was full with 2 kids waiting. My Mom lived a couple block over so i ran to motorcycle flew to Mom's house ran in bathroom, yanked down shorts and underwear and exploded in the toilet just in time I thought. Finished my business and went back to game. As I was sitting down in stands, the people behind me knew me and said i had something all over the back of my shorts and shirt. I just thought i had made it in time. I handled it like a pro and said "Thanks, I must have sit in somethign and went home."


As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: Beadlescomb] #861164
02/13/14 06:41 AM
02/13/14 06:41 AM
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 12,018
chilton co.
trox28 Offline
on probation
trox28  Offline
on probation
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 12,018
chilton co.
Originally Posted By: Beadlescomb

Originally Posted By: daniel white

Originally Posted By: shootnmiss
Me my wife n three kids at acadamy on night. Id been dranking patron, stomach got tore up and I chit myself, BAD. It was running in my boots.
Had to ride home nekkid in back of truck in December.


WTF?? are u for real?


We've all been there


No..no we havent. laugh

Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: bama7x57] #861185
02/13/14 06:46 AM
02/13/14 06:46 AM
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 1,404
Gainesville, Florida
Ian Offline
8 point
Ian  Offline
8 point
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 1,404
Gainesville, Florida
Originally Posted By: bama7x57
I once informed the President of our company that he has something stuck on his forehead. He politely informed me he was Catholic and it was Ash Wednesday. My heart sank, but he was cool about it.


It could be worse, I asked my district manager if he wanted a slice of my bacon pizza... He's jewish

About thirty minutes later I had a coming to point realizing what I did.

Next time he came in I apologized, he was cool about it.

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