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Embarrassing stories #860729
02/12/14 07:02 PM
02/12/14 07:02 PM
Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 8,456
Harpersville, AL
tfd1224 Offline OP
14 point
tfd1224  Offline OP
14 point
Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 8,456
Harpersville, AL
I like a good ole embarrasing story every now and then. Here's mine. I downloaded what I thought was a really funny ringtone to my phone and kinda forgot about it. I went over to my neighbors house on my 4 wheeler to ask him about something. My neighbor is a really really religious and straight laced guy, home schools his kids etc. as we are sitting there talking I feel my phone vibrate in my back pocket and I say hold on a second, then this British butler type voice comes over my phone and says " someone is endeavoring to contact you, shall I tell them to fu** off?" I think I turned 50 shades of red. I immediately went home and deleted that ringtone. Keep em coming


Yeah c’mon. Daniel White
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860735
02/12/14 07:05 PM
02/12/14 07:05 PM
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 15,952
Brierfield
Beadlescomb Offline
Old Mossy Horns
Beadlescomb  Offline
Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 15,952
Brierfield
I shucks and pissed my pants from laughing at a buddy falling out of a boat


Come to think of it that sum bitch falls out of the boat all of the time. Usually a sign we are going to get on some fish

Last edited by Beadlescomb; 02/12/14 07:10 PM.

We will burn that bridge when we get there
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860743
02/12/14 07:08 PM
02/12/14 07:08 PM
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 44,211
North Alabama
W
Wiley Coyote Offline
Freak of Nature
Wiley Coyote  Offline
Freak of Nature
W
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 44,211
North Alabama
Had a ringtone that was an East Indian voice thing...."Bing bing-ding ding-hello-good bye-thank you-bing bing" and it rang when I was paying at a dang convenience store with a dot Indian behind the counter laugh It was actually funny as Hell now that I think about it.

Had another one that was gunshots with a few ricochet sounds. It rang while I was in a meeting in a conference room on Redstone. Everybody just laughed. That one actually kinda embarrassed me. laugh


I firmly believe that a double gallows should be constructed on the East Lawn of The White House. Politicians who willfully and shamelessly violate their oath to uphold and defend the Constitution of the United States of America should be swiftly tried and, upon conviction, publicly hanged at sunup the day after conviction. If multiple convicts are to be hanged they can choose with whom to share the gallows or names shall be drawn from the hangman's hat to be hanged 2 at a time.




NRA Life Member
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860747
02/12/14 07:11 PM
02/12/14 07:11 PM
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 9,643
Pisgah Al
Bigbamaboy Offline
14 point
Bigbamaboy  Offline
14 point
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 9,643
Pisgah Al
That's pretty good. I was goin to start this thread the other day and you beat me to it.

When I was about ten years old, I was out entertaining my self with a can of black spray paint. Idk what I was thinkin but i wrote some profanities on a huge stump in our back yard. I was going to paint over them, but due to a short attention span i was off to something else. Latter on that day my parents had some friends over. One of them goes walkin into the back and bust out laughing. I soon realized what the fuss was about. Whoops.


Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860756
02/12/14 07:17 PM
02/12/14 07:17 PM
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 2,427
MattIce Offline
10 point
MattIce  Offline
10 point
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 2,427
Haha. Here's one of mine.
Back in school towards the end of the day between the last two classes of the day I went to take a piss. After being up all night I was half asleep and somehow forgot to unzip my pants. I pissed all over myself and didn't realize it till I got to my next class and the whole class began to smell piss. Was a rough evening.


Parked in a holler, beneath the mountain moon light.
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860763
02/12/14 07:20 PM
02/12/14 07:20 PM
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 9,643
Pisgah Al
Bigbamaboy Offline
14 point
Bigbamaboy  Offline
14 point
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 9,643
Pisgah Al
It wasnt me, but the ringtones reminded me of a funny story. We were at work one day and for some reason were at an alternator shop in Rainsville. The owner is a super nice guy and is very conservative. He has a sign up in his store that reads something along the lines of " No profanity, respect others, no dirty jokes etc."
well one coworker sends another one a text while we are standing in a crowd of men. When he opens it a funny voice screams out " hey everybody look, I have gay porn on my cell phone, no look, really I have lots of gay porn on my cell phone".

The guy who opened the text is easily embarrassed and he panicked. He couldn't turn the message off and it just kept playing till he just ran outside. I was in tears.

Last edited by Bigbamaboy; 02/12/14 07:22 PM.

Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860770
02/12/14 07:25 PM
02/12/14 07:25 PM
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 23,871
Clarksville, TN /Greenville, ...
bill Offline
Freak of Nature
bill  Offline
Freak of Nature
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 23,871
Clarksville, TN /Greenville, ...

Met a guy from Selma that started working at the grocery store I worked at. I started telling him about this crazy girl I met that lived there and how nuts she was. Turned out it was his sister.


"Political debate: when charlatans come together to discuss their principles"
-
Bauvard
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860771
02/12/14 07:26 PM
02/12/14 07:26 PM
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 44,211
North Alabama
W
Wiley Coyote Offline
Freak of Nature
Wiley Coyote  Offline
Freak of Nature
W
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 44,211
North Alabama
Another ringtone.....reminded me of a friend who's teenage son downloaded some ringtones on his Dad's phone and assigned them to different incoming calls. A few days later we were at work, in a building with suits and ties present, and this guy gets a call " Hey you no good child support skipping son-of-a-bitch" ......He turned every shade of red in the color spectrum and ran outside apologizing the whole way

Last edited by Wiley Coyote; 02/12/14 07:27 PM.

I firmly believe that a double gallows should be constructed on the East Lawn of The White House. Politicians who willfully and shamelessly violate their oath to uphold and defend the Constitution of the United States of America should be swiftly tried and, upon conviction, publicly hanged at sunup the day after conviction. If multiple convicts are to be hanged they can choose with whom to share the gallows or names shall be drawn from the hangman's hat to be hanged 2 at a time.




NRA Life Member
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: bill] #860775
02/12/14 07:29 PM
02/12/14 07:29 PM
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 9,643
Pisgah Al
Bigbamaboy Offline
14 point
Bigbamaboy  Offline
14 point
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 9,643
Pisgah Al
Originally Posted By: bill

Met a guy from Selma that started working at the grocery store I worked at. I started telling him about this crazy girl I met that lived there and how nuts she was. Turned out it was his sister.


Could have been a lot worse. She could have been good lookin and...


Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860790
02/12/14 07:44 PM
02/12/14 07:44 PM
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 44,211
North Alabama
W
Wiley Coyote Offline
Freak of Nature
Wiley Coyote  Offline
Freak of Nature
W
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 44,211
North Alabama
A friend of mine in hardware sales went to a trade show in Shreveport back about 1980. Checked it at a hotel and there was a fine little lady working the desk. He checks in, cleans up, comes down to flirt and see where it goes. They end up going to dinner and back at the hotel, in the elevator he's kissing her and reacher under her skirt. She's got more junk than him. Claimed he stopped the elevator and beat the Hell out of "it". I guarantee if it had happened to me there would only be 2 people that EVER knew about it


I firmly believe that a double gallows should be constructed on the East Lawn of The White House. Politicians who willfully and shamelessly violate their oath to uphold and defend the Constitution of the United States of America should be swiftly tried and, upon conviction, publicly hanged at sunup the day after conviction. If multiple convicts are to be hanged they can choose with whom to share the gallows or names shall be drawn from the hangman's hat to be hanged 2 at a time.




NRA Life Member
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860792
02/12/14 07:46 PM
02/12/14 07:46 PM
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 51,938
Over Yonder
C
Clem Offline
Mildly Quirky
Clem  Offline
Mildly Quirky
C
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 51,938
Over Yonder
In high school I was working at our grocery store stocking eggs. The mortician in town was coming up the aisle. A nice, Christian man. Proper, as you might expect a funeral home owner to be.

"Good evening," he said.

Out of habit I said:

"Hey, Mr. Peck! How're you doing? Been busy lately?"

It was like the world stopped turning for about 4.3 seconds as what I said literally sunk into my brain and then warped around reason. He merely smiled as I stammered a breathless apology and said, "That's OK. I hear that a lot from my friends. Fortunately, we haven't been lately."


"Hunting Politics are stupid!" - Farm Hunter

"Bible says you shouldn't put sugar in your cornbread." Dustin, 2013

"Best I can figure 97.365% of the general public is a paint chip eating, mouth breathing, certified dumbass." BCLC, 2020
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860800
02/12/14 07:52 PM
02/12/14 07:52 PM
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 44,211
North Alabama
W
Wiley Coyote Offline
Freak of Nature
Wiley Coyote  Offline
Freak of Nature
W
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 44,211
North Alabama
laugh that would be m-baraskin Clem laugh


I firmly believe that a double gallows should be constructed on the East Lawn of The White House. Politicians who willfully and shamelessly violate their oath to uphold and defend the Constitution of the United States of America should be swiftly tried and, upon conviction, publicly hanged at sunup the day after conviction. If multiple convicts are to be hanged they can choose with whom to share the gallows or names shall be drawn from the hangman's hat to be hanged 2 at a time.




NRA Life Member
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860802
02/12/14 07:54 PM
02/12/14 07:54 PM
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 51,938
Over Yonder
C
Clem Offline
Mildly Quirky
Clem  Offline
Mildly Quirky
C
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 51,938
Over Yonder
Foot, mouth, the entire shebang.


"Hunting Politics are stupid!" - Farm Hunter

"Bible says you shouldn't put sugar in your cornbread." Dustin, 2013

"Best I can figure 97.365% of the general public is a paint chip eating, mouth breathing, certified dumbass." BCLC, 2020
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860847
02/12/14 09:44 PM
02/12/14 09:44 PM
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 8,622
Blount County
BamaBart Offline
Panty Wearin' Hunter
BamaBart  Offline
Panty Wearin' Hunter
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 8,622
Blount County
My son's in-laws are great people. His father-in-law is a retired principle and his mother-in-law is a retired teacher. They are very sweet people! I was talking to his mother-in-law about a guy I know who died of prostate cancer. I had forgotten that her husband (my son's father-in-law) had prostate cancer and was having some problems after his surgery! She got tears in her eyes and I felt like a fool! slap
I changed the subject really quick! That was over a year ago and I still feel bad about it! blush


.
.
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: Wiley Coyote] #860884
02/13/14 02:19 AM
02/13/14 02:19 AM
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 5,402
Irvington, AL
sethjamtoe Offline
12 point
sethjamtoe  Offline
12 point
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 5,402
Irvington, AL
Originally Posted By: Wiley Coyote
Had a ringtone that was an East Indian voice thing...."Bing bing-ding ding-hello-good bye-thank you-bing bing" and it rang when I was paying at a dang convenience store with a dot Indian behind the counter laugh It was actually funny as Hell now that I think about it.

Had another one that was gunshots with a few ricochet sounds. It rang while I was in a meeting in a conference room on Redstone. Everybody just laughed. That one actually kinda embarrassed me. laugh


I used to have the gunshot one too....until I was standing in line at the bank and someone called me! I promptly deleted that ringtone! ha ha ha

Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: BamaBart] #860893
02/13/14 02:29 AM
02/13/14 02:29 AM
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 24,761
Buc-ee’s Beach Express
leroycnbucks Offline
Freak of Nature
leroycnbucks  Offline
Freak of Nature
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 24,761
Buc-ee’s Beach Express
I accidentally went into the woman's restroom and did a big ole #2. I had to go so bad that I didn't pay any attention to the name tag above the door. There were no ladies in it when I first walked in but about a half duzen were in there when I finished. The looks on their faces when I opened that stall door was priceless. I washed my hands and smiled and said thank you ladies. Then I pretty much ran to the truck and got the heck out of there.


Proud Army and ALNG veteran
God Bless America!
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860897
02/13/14 02:42 AM
02/13/14 02:42 AM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 10,979
wedowee
daniel white Offline
Booner
daniel white  Offline
Booner
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 10,979
wedowee
Aww, man I got some good ones sure is a lot of typing though.

Excuse the grammer

When I was 18, I went on a beach vacation for the first time ever with my girlfriend "now wife" family. They had a Condo down there that they went to ever year, It was called the Shores, now it the Escapes. Anyway, it only had two bedrooms, one with 2 full beds and one master room, they was both up stairs. So I told my in-laws that I would sleep on the couch down stairs, BUT nooooo they insisted that I sleep upstairs they trusted me and there daughter, that we could just wear pajamas and sleep in separate beds. HE HE HE, well it didn't exactly go down like that. About the third or fourth morning there, Southwire calls me for a job interview, well my phone is down stairs and I am up stairs, trying to burn the bearings out of it. So my MIL being the nice lady she is, does the ole no knock method. Well she saw a sight she didn't want to see, she drops my phone and takes off hollering and running. So hell I couldn't waste what energy I done used, so I finished what I was doing, got on the phone got a interview set up and went down to face some PISSED OFF parents. Ahh the good ole days.


"You do and it will be the biggest mistake you ever made, you Texas brush popper" John Wayne
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: daniel white] #860900
02/13/14 02:45 AM
02/13/14 02:45 AM
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 16,156
Alabaster
Bowhunter84 Offline
Old Mossy Horns
Bowhunter84  Offline
Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 16,156
Alabaster
Originally Posted By: daniel white
Aww, man I got some good ones sure is a lot of typing though.

Excuse the grammer

When I was 18, I went on a beach vacation for the first time ever with my girlfriend "now wife" family. They had a Condo down there that they went to ever year, It was called the Shores, now it the Escapes. Anyway, it only had two bedrooms, one with 2 full beds and one master room, they was both up stairs. So I told my in-laws that I would sleep on the couch down stairs, BUT nooooo they insisted that I sleep upstairs they trusted me and there daughter, that we could just wear pajamas and sleep in separate beds. HE HE HE, well it didn't exactly go down like that. About the third or fourth morning there, Southwire calls me for a job interview, well my phone is down stairs and I am up stairs, trying to burn the bearings out of it. So my MIL being the nice lady she is, does the ole no knock method. Well she saw a sight she didn't want to see, she drops my phone and takes off hollering and running. So hell I couldn't waste what energy I done used, so I finished what I was doing, got on the phone got a interview set up and went down to face some PISSED OFF parents. Ahh the good ole days.



rofl


"Just remember a gobbler has to win every time, you only have to win once"
BC
Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: tfd1224] #860901
02/13/14 02:46 AM
02/13/14 02:46 AM
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 337
Fayette
Tittle Offline
4 point
Tittle  Offline
4 point
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 337
Fayette
I was sixteen and had just gotten my first bass boat. My cousin and I were fishing a tourney on the warrior. He backed me down and I was idling around in the dark waiting to pick him up at the dock ( thinking I was king of hill). I eased up to the dock and he said " is there a reason for all that water in the floor?" I forgot the plug... Almost sunk it the first time I went by myself.

Re: Embarrassing stories [Re: Bowhunter84] #860904
02/13/14 02:53 AM
02/13/14 02:53 AM
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 15,952
Brierfield
Beadlescomb Offline
Old Mossy Horns
Beadlescomb  Offline
Old Mossy Horns
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 15,952
Brierfield

Originally Posted By: Bowhunter84
Originally Posted By: daniel white
Aww, man I got some good ones sure is a lot of typing though.

Excuse the grammer

When I was 18, I went on a beach vacation for the first time ever with my girlfriend "now wife" family. They had a Condo down there that they went to ever year, It was called the Shores, now it the Escapes. Anyway, it only had two bedrooms, one with 2 full beds and one master room, they was both up stairs. So I told my in-laws that I would sleep on the couch down stairs, BUT nooooo they insisted that I sleep upstairs they trusted me and there daughter, that we could just wear pajamas and sleep in separate beds. HE HE HE, well it didn't exactly go down like that. About the third or fourth morning there, Southwire calls me for a job interview, well my phone is down stairs and I am up stairs, trying to burn the bearings out of it. So my MIL being the nice lady she is, does the ole no knock method. Well she saw a sight she didn't want to see, she drops my phone and takes off hollering and running. So hell I couldn't waste what energy I done used, so I finished what I was doing, got on the phone got a interview set up and went down to face some PISSED OFF parents. Ahh the good ole days.



Been there before that's a rough feeling

rofl


We will burn that bridge when we get there
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