My daughter is getting married next year to a great guy. I just read that the AVERAGE wedding today costs $44k not including ring and honeymoon. I love her but no way can I spend that. Her mother and I are divorced and she makes great money and she was mostly raised by her. Both my daughter and her fiancé have great jobs (26 years old). I'm thinking about just offering her $5k and let her and her mom plan it and make up the difference.

5k is good. Give the cash, stay away from the drama.

The amount of money people spend on weddings is asinine. I think ours was in the $3-4k range for everything. We had the actual ceremony and a small park gazebo overlooking the river (before it was all over-developed) with about 40-50 people, then we had a small reception in one of the smaller banquet rooms at the Hilton Garden. It was very nice, without being stupid expensive.

I just can't fathom spending $20k (much less 2-3x that, which isn't uncommon) on a wedding. Hell, if the couple had that kind of cash (or their parents were willing to give that kind of cash), a newlywed couple would be infinitely better off putting that toward a home.

$5k?
Hahaha hahaha. You funny.
As the father of the bride, your invitation costs twice that much.

Yeah my dad told me years ago if your old enough to get married your old enough to pay for it. After my first wife and I were married and moved into our first house he gave us $5000 to help with what ever our needs were. So fast forward to a daughter and two sons and I gave them the exact same advice. I also gave each $5000 after they we’re married. To help them with there needs. Just my opinion but why waste that much money on wants as a young couple when needs are so much more important.

Two industries I dislike the most are the wedding and funeral industry

I was in a meeting with a big wig three weeks ago. He was complaining before the meeting started that they spent $60K on the wedding dress and the wedding budget was $240K.

I'm all for folks being able to spend their money however they see fit....but someone that spends $60k on a dress and $240k on a wedding needs to be slapped in the face.

Good luck trying to win that argument with most any bride today.

I don't mind the funeral. I ain't paying for that one. 😆

When I worked the Camden area, several years ago, (like 25 years ago) one of my customer's in Miller's Ferry spent $600,000 on his daughter's wedding.
That's right, $600k! At today's market prices that would easy be over a million.

You don't have to argue when your the one with the money. I agree with what someone else posted. I would rather have had a small low cost wedding and more money in hand towards a house or whatever the real needs may be. Of course that's logical thinking, they don't teach that anymore.

My wife and I were told that we could have a wedding or a check for $8k to put towards a house so we went to the courthouse and got it done quick and cheap. Neither one of us could see a point in wasting all of that money on having one day of being the center of attention. It's ridiculous.

If a woman would choose an elaborate wedding over a down payment on a home, that right there ought to be a major RED FLAG that she is too BSC to marry.

Some weddings in Brewton in the past few years have been rumored to have eclipsed $1MM.

My wife and I gave a $100 donation to the City of Bartlett Animal Shelter (the JOP's choice), then hopped on a flight to San Diego for a week.

That was 17.5 years ago, and I reckon we're just as happy and I know we're just as married as anyone who spent many thousands more.

I got married in 2017..cost me about $300...didnt ask knobody for nothin...an when it was over..i told everbody to go home...ive got work to do.

I really don't see how people run up such large wedding tabs.

My father in law gave my wife $5k. Told her to use it wisely.

We got married at our church, with a reception there for free... only cost was food/drinks.
Wife bought a dress for around $750.

At the end of the day, we had over $1k left as play money on the honeymoon.

In fact, my parents ended up spending as much on the honeymoon (plane/hotel/rental car/etc) as her parents did.

If a woman would choose an elaborate wedding over a down payment on a home, that right there ought to be a major RED FLAG that she is too BSC to marry. [/quote]

I concur.

We got married at our church, reception was at our house. Only real costs were crawfish at the rehearsal dinner, then the band and food at the reception. Cheap and everyone had a blast.

It might be worth just having a conversation with your daughter and see what she is thinking about in terms of her wedding. It could be that she wants something simple and not lavish and real expensive. She might, also, just be planning for her and her fiance to pay for it all so they can have everything they want without feeling like there are things they can or cannot do/have for their big day. Then, whatever she chooses to do, you can tell her that you have X amount to contribute for her to use as she sees fit, whether it is toward the wedding, honeymoon, a down payment on a house or new furnishings, etc.

I have a friend whose father told her that he would give her X amount for her wedding, but that the less she spent on the wedding, the more she would get in cash up to that amount. So, she opted to use artificial flowers for much of her wedding and reception and did a ton of DIY things to save money and I think ended up only spending about half of what her dad offered her for the actual wedding and reception and got the other half to put toward their first home.